More tranny stories later!
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
