capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
