We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize
