I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
