we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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