It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
ttyl tear gas
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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