I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
