Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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