somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize
