I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
the day after is always just damage control
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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