let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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