The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Randomize
