Did you just see the Batmobile???
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
