He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
