Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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