i don't like sucking hair
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize