it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize