NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize