If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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