I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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