yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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