3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
