White coat. Heels.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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