A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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