Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
