im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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