i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
