dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
