On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
