she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
you made out with another girl for some wings
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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