Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
That's intense
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
