new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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