im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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