This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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