It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
