If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
