I heard we made out
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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