my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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