What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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