After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Randomize
