the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
