Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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