A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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