and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
