4 words: hood of his car
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
