I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
