guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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