I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize