And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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