Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
