Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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