these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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